Don’t you find yourself sometimes just being dumbfounded at the things kids say? Dumbfounded in a good way naman I mean because I am sometimes taken aback by David’s comments and observations. I am grateful though that he always comes to me and Dan and that he shares his thoughts without any filter and self-censorship. I pray that even when he’s older he would still seek me and Dan to talk to about anything at all – from the mundane to the life changing. It’s an experience that is far different from my own childhood.
Growing up I grew up never really “talked” with my parents. We never really discussed anything that were important to me (or at least that I felt were important to me) and it seemed like things were just handed down to us siblings because it was the rule. No ifs, no buts, no questions allowed. Granted I was a minor then but I never really felt like my input or ideas were part of any family decisions.
I am thankful though that this dynamic changed when I got older and most especially when I became a mom. Thanks to Coach Pia too, I have learned tools to help me get over certain fears and past hurts.
So growing up with that absence makes me welcome our Kuya’s “Davidisms” all the more with an open heart, an open mind and more often than not with open arms because I always find myself hugging and kissing David after our talks. I want him to always feel that mama is a safe person to talk to who will not judge him and who will make every effort to listen to him.
Which means that he is free to tell me:
“Mama my pwet is cold!”
and he will always be free to tell me:
“Mama, remember when Noah was in your tummy and I wished that he would be the cutest baby and would have the cutest smile? I am so happy my hopes came true”
Oh god that last part. He is on a roll with Noah now too, always declaring that he’s so happy Noah’s his brother. May that never change at all.
The flip side of this though is because David’s getting older, he’s getting naughtier and getting craftier with his reasoning. His favorite naman now is
“You like Noah better than me!”
Which stabs me and Dan to our core! And we have to make the effort to let him know that we love him as much as we love Noah but we both love them in different ways. Of course we just stop at the fact that Noah’s still learning a lot of things. Pero whenever we say “No” to Noah it’s kuya naman to the rescue
“Dada, your voice is making Noah cry! Don’t be mad!”
Yeeeep a lot of talking goes on in our house. A lot of Davidisms are thrown every second too. I cherish these moments even if sometimes it just gets too much (madaldal talaga si David, I wonder where he got it heeeheee).
My most basic guide though when talking to David is this Peggy O’Mara quote. I realized how true this is based on experience and right now I am trying to talk to my innervoice to be more positive and kind to myself (another Coach Pia learning)
So I am hoping that Kuya’s inner voice is one that is kind to him and is encouraging. One that will always be gentle to him and find him funny and sweet. But I also want the voice to be firm with him and to guide him to good and just decisions. Hmm inner voice = conscience?!
No doubt it’s hard parenting a talkative pre-schooler but it is definitely a privilege. David coming up to us and sharing with us his day and new discoveries is such a joy to experience. I always look forward to Davidisms and my day is never complete without them. Yes they can be challenging at times and I have to be very creative with my answers but hey a mom’s gotta do what a mom’s gotta do (or say) diba? Because one thing will always be clear…
We love you Kuya!!